www.tmcm.com

I know a lot of you guys are against copy-pasting .. But this is an awesome thing I came accross on www.tmcm.com . Thats where you can read Too Much Coffee Man .. He's the dude ..
These two articles were written by the reviewer of the book.
Promise originality next time .. Just thought that you guys HAVE to read this !

I Interview Satan:
More and more over the past few years Americans have been using the term "evil" to describe the various manifestations of Islamic extremism. Are you concerned that terrorist groups are stealing your spotlight?

They're an inconvenience, I have to admit. But hey, if they're getting all the attention it just means I've been slacking off. The competition is ultimately a good thing because it will force me to improve, to take my game to the next level.

So in a sense you support a free-market approach to evil?

Definitely, and it's a real relief. Everything with the communists was this huge beuracracy. Evil was dispersed by the state and to do my thing I needed the approval of one committee after another. Everything had to be proposed, quantified, signed in triplicate...the Stalinists were a real bitch to work with.

How would you rate the suicide bombing, in terms of it's evilness?

I'm really not into this indiscriminate killing stuff. Where's the artistry? Where's the finesse? Back in the 80's, if I wanted to send a message, I would just write up a few evil lyrics and quietly place them on a popular rock album. I would even write them backwards, I was all about the subtlety. At the very most I might physically appear on someones shoulder and whisper evil suggestions in their ear...but I would be really, really tiny, an inch tall at the most. These jihadists, on the other hand, they're such drama queens. They're like, "Wow, America really sucks. Anyway..." BOOM!! I'm not getting where the anger is coming from. There are worse things in life than America blowing up your country and building a giant Taco Bell in it's place. I mean, I live in a frickin' lake of fire...I would kill to have a nice strip mall in the area.

America has also seen a huge rise in the popularity of your rival, God. Is this something you are worried about?

It's a problem. Note to Mel Gibson: die please. His action film starring Jesus has been a PR disaster for me. I'm seemingly invisible right now, yet Jesus is selling more DVDs than Shrek 2...so yeah, I've been a little worried.

[Next Week: I kick it with Allah.]


I Field Questions From A Popular Girl Band. Cursing Ensues.
The meaningless wasteland of pop culture has shit out yet another vacuous, no-talent girl band. They were undoubtedly put together by some souless corporate hack eager to sell crass and demeaning fantasies to the herd-like public we so clearly are. They're called The Pussycat Dolls, but don't let the clever double entendre fool you...they're actually very, very stupid. I think a more apt band name would be The Life-like Blow Up Dolls. And surprisingly, their music sucks beyond all knowing. Have you seen them yet? Have you had that misfortune? Like all prancing, scantily-clad morons on MTV they work very hard to convince stupid pre-teen boys that the female body exists solely for the purpose of male gratification. As an added bonus, their new song (which is currently #1 on Billboard's pop singles chart) includes a series of questions for the men out there. Which is just very considerate of them. I mean, I have a little free time today. I'd be happy to answer their questions (and these quotes are actual lyrics from the song...this should depress you. )

Pussycat Dolls: "Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me?"

No. No I don't. If I'm in the mood for plastic, manufactured beauty I'll hook up with Barbie.

PD: "Don't you wish your girlfriend was a freak like me?"

Oh HELL no. If want a dozen STDs I'll fuck a petri dish, okay?

PD: "Don't you wish your girlfriend was fun like me?"

Right. You're undoubtedly a terrific conversationalist. I mean, gosh, look at these fantastic lyrics you've written. Die.

PD: "Don't you wish your girlfriend was raw like me?"

This doesn't even make sense. Did someone run out of variations on the lyric? Did someone bounce a check from the word bank?

I know I'm preaching to the choir, but there are plenty of talented musicians out there. Find them. Buy their music. Make the scary robot bands go away.